Note to Aspiring Bloggers...

...don't be a slacker like me! Posting once a month or less is no way to attract readers. Sigh.

Anyways, per Bethany's request, I am writing an entry. I hope Bethany will now have something to do this afternoon. :)

So what have I been up to lately? Well, I'm working on graduating at the end of April - can't wait-, I've been living in my grandmother's abode (aka housesitting) while she is cooped up in Cali, I have been working for vending for BYU (manual labor, YEA!), etc, etc.

I have seen a couple good movies lately: Confessions of a Shopaholic, and He's Just not that Into You. My goal is to see Slumdog Millionaire tonight! Can't wait! The first two I listed, though chick flicks, were both good in their own ways. Both chick flicks, but two different moods in either. And actually, the He's Just not that Into You film is what I have been thinking about today, for no whatever reason.

To set up the premise of the book/movie, it's basically a bunch of relationship scenarios in which the girl (or guy) make up excuses for the significant other's lack of pursuit. ie, he's out of town so he can't call me, his mom might be in the hospital, he's married, etc etc. Now, ok maybe some excuses like he's married are justified (LOL) but still the bottom line is, HE's JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU! If he is on his business trip, great, but he will find time to call you if he's interested. He will ask you out on a date if he's interested, he will divorce his wife he likes you THAT much (again I don't necessarily condone this one obviously so don't read into it that way, I'm just stating a fact of life). If not, move on til you find a guy who IS into you. Because a into you type of guy will not miss out on his chance to be with you, right?

ANYWAYS, there's a specific scenario about a married couple- the guy has an affair with another girl. He tells the girl he likes her, but he is too "wussy" to leave his wife- so instead, he plays both of them, telling the girl he loves her, telling his wife he loves her. So in essence, the he's just not that into you plays for both girls: the wife, because if he loved her so much, why is cheating? And the girlfriend- why doesn't he leave his wife for her?

Well, eventually (and sorry, this is a big SPOILER!!! DO NOT READ IF YOU DON'T WANT SOME OF THE ENDING GIVEN AWAY- BUT THEN YOU'LL MISS OUT ON THE POINT OF MY ENTRY, LOL), the wife leaves him. She flat out dumps his ass on a corner somewhere. Well, not really, but she shifts into female empowerment gear and moves on in her life, and even though it probably hurts, she is all the better for it. Sighh. What a wonderful scene. Or is it?

Let's just say, it is COMPLETELY UNREALISTIC. Sure, that is what every neglected woman in this world should do. Cut the crap, move on. Don't sit there waiting for the db to change, while you could really spend your time with someone who actually cares. Or so the writers of the book would say. However, in the movie, the woman must have a pretty nice job, because she moves out and gets a new fancy apartment somewhere in Baltimore. She doesn't have to move into her parents' spare bedroom with 5 kids, because she doesn't even have any kids. So while the way she deals with her husbands' cheating is admirable, most wives can't afford to walk out. I think that is one reason why they always try to "work it out" with their husband. "Where am I gonna go? I don't have a job, a livelihood. I don't think anyone will ever be attracted to me b/c I've gained 50lbs after all these kids. I don't even have any marketable skills".

Now I do have a problem with women who don't practice their marketable skills (in case of a rainy day) but honestly that is another topic for another day. But what I am saying IS along those lines: What does a woman do? Stay, knowing that her husband may hurt her again and again- forgive him, not because you have forgiveness to give, but because it's your only chance for survival? I guess I feel bad for women who don't have tons of $$, who don't have marketable skills, etc to help them get through a divorce...so in return they end up staying in a bad relationship. Because even though I'm close to graduation, I wonder what I would do if I got divorced. Already, after 1.5 yrs of marriage, I feel dependent to the point where I don't know what I'd do if didn't have my husband. That's a scary thought, and it's something EVERY WOMAN, no matter how young or old, needs to consider. Because you just never know.

I know this could be guys too, I just used woman throughout the post to make it easier, but a man could definitely find himself in the same situation..

Ok I'm off. :)

Juicy Secrets

Have you ever heard of postsecret? If not, check it out and it's pretty obvious what it is- people send their secrets in on postcards and the blogger posts about 20 each Sunday. It has been so successful that they have published at least 3 giant books full of postsecrets. And one of my secrets? One day I want to get off my lazy butt and send in my own secret! 

Anyways, this LDS blogger Pulispher Predilections, recently sponsored her own type of postsecret, inviting readers to anonymously post their secrets in the comments section. Unfortunately, she closed it before I could post my secret, but 451 people posted! And many of them I swear I could've written. Others however, were super depressing, I wanted to cry for them, because I realize that the poker face is way too common- we have no idea what people are feeling or going through, do we? I think if I sent in a secret mine would probably be: Thanks to postsecret, I learned how normal I really am. :)

Here are some of the interesting secrets submitted. My comments will tell you how I feel about the given secrets:

-I appear to believe in the Church, but I don't anymore. This was said fairly frequently amongst the LDS secrets, though in many different ways. There are a lot of people putting on a facade to impress their neighbors, but in reality, it's just to keep up with the Joneses. I hope people learn to escape that trap. Being honest with yourself and others is the best way to feel sane- it is seriously so rewarding. 

-My first husband cheated on me so many times that when he unexpectedly died, I was relieved. There were a lot of posts about relationships that aren't so hot. Husbands are lazy, unappreciative, neglecting, etc. Since 50% of marriages end up in divorce and among the ones that survive, I'd bet only 20% are actually good, it's no surprise. Relationships are by no means easy, and I could go on and on on this topic for hours, but basically, not all relationships should be continued, such as the one above. For those with "smaller" problems, get help.

-Most of the time I feel like a teenager pretending to be an adult. Every once in awhile I'm terrified someone's gonna call me on it. "What do you think you're doing?! You don't belong here with us REAL adults!" hehe. It's because adults have always looked like they know what they're doing, and since I definitely don't know what I'm doing, I don't feel like how I always imagined it would be to be an adult. Then one day I realized, adults are just as confused as kids! :)

-I'm ready for another baby. My husband isn't. And I don't know what to do. I wish I could get my IUD removed without telling him, but the guilt would eat away at me.
And he'd know what I'd spent money on. I HATE being on such a strict budget that there is absolutlely no wiggle room. Well, I can't relate to the wanting a baby thing- but I do think communication is key. Obv it's missing  from this relationship. And the $$ thing is also problematic. Certainly $ can be tight, but I take issue with women confined to their husbands via the pocketbook. 

-I wish Mormon women who have been through the temple could wear sexier underwear than our garments. I appreciate and understand what the garments represent, and I'm thankful for that, but they are seriously unsexy. I would be happy with just a more comfortable one, particularly for my body shape. Like, why are all the good cuts in slippery, bunchy fabric? And I wish I just didn't feel 10lbs heavier when wearing them. Otherwise, while not sexy in the least, I like wearing them anyways.

-I spend too much money and most of it my husband doesn't know about. I'm such a pig. I second this! I am definitely a little miss piggy. Although my husband eventually knows about it b/c I can't keep a secret for the life of me.

-I read "Between Husband and Wife" and it says specifically to not use Sex as a bargaining tool. So I don't, and I think were happier because of it. I did not read this book, but I agree. I know of couples that if the wife can get a new pair of shoes she will give it to him. It's like prostitution. Our bargaining tool is that if husband can get rock climbing holds or whatev, I can get more makeup! :)


-It bugs me when members of the church don't keep the Sabbath day holy. It's so disrespectful and it sets a bad example for their kids.

-and-

-I hate when people don't keep their temple covenants.

I wish that people would not worry so much about who goes to church, who keeps the sabbath day holy or who does or doesn't keep their temple covenants. The covenants belong to the individual or couple that made them, and if they don't keep them, it's their deal, no one else's. Why do we lose sleep at night worrying about what someone else is or isn't doing? 

The biggest problem with *some* of the members of the church is their desire to single-handedly perfect everyone else- and they will often stop at nothing until they think they have accomplished just that. The reality is, no one in this entire church is perfect. 

-i find some of these secrets really really sad. i hope those of you who really have some hard secrets do something about them. talk to a counselor or find a social worker. please. it will make you happier... I hope many of those people do just that, and that they'll confront and accept their imperfections. Instead of worrying how we look to the Joneses, how about we enjoy being different?

Barry O

So, there are a lot of griping (particularly from the LDS community) about our brand-spanking-new Pres. O- apparently a lot of peeps are annoyed at the "hope" this new presidency brings to the U.S. people. Yea, because hope is something pubes simply aren't used to feeling from their party. I keep hearing comments like "people think everything's gonna change over night b/c of Obama, but it won't" blah blah blah and the like. Obv, it should be a given that things will take a long time to change, and most likely few changes will be made even within the first term.  Believe it or not, some misinformed people out there think now that Obama is in we are all going to be millionaires- literally. Kid you not. Wave a magic wand and all of Bush's wreckage (and then some) is going to be gone. 

I prefer to appeal to Obama himself, in something he said during his inauguration address. As he was talking about change, I was thinking of JFK's famous quote: "Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country" and just as I was thinking that, President Barry pretty much said the same thing in his own words, inviting all Americans to go forward looking for ways to accelerate change. I was like "A-freaking-men"! Change depends on how much we, the American people want it, and what we do to facilitate that change. There's very little Obama can do as president- really, he doesn't have as much power as we think to actually physically do things, but one thing he can do is generate hope for us to grab onto. Can you see how people have become so hopeful lately? Optimistic? Things are going to get better, or so we think. And sometimes the right attitude makes all the difference. Economists always talk about consumer confidence and its impact on the market. Confidence can definitely facilitate good things. Again, like I said before, we still need to work for it, as there's little that the government can do, but I am glad most people approve of Obama. 

Mr. President, Have Pity on the Working Man

It's times like these that to be honest, I am grateful we have a democrat president. Democrats are notorious for their desire to help the individual, and although that has been criticized (most people on welfare abuse it, or people who get help from the gov't are lazy, yadda yadda yadda), I think we are starting to appreciate that idea, since even the hardest working people are suffering right now. I love that yesterday Obama met with congressional leaders to discuss a $300 billion tax cut, which would save the average person $500 in taxes ($1000 a couple). As with EVERY decision that President Obama will make, there are obviously supporters and opponents, but I think what he said about it was most important: "The reason we are here today is because the people's business cannot wait". This is evident of how in tune Obama is with the American people. He realizes that something MUST be done, and it cannot be the usual, or what would be done in a normal time. This is a time of struggle that is different from any other we've seen- ever. Even the Great Depression was different, because things have changed so much. We rely a lot more on international products, our economy therefore affecting the entire world. Anyways, I have always loved Paul Newman's song Mr. President; I always thought of Bush every time I heard it over the past 8 years, but I always sighed knowing that he was simply too out of touch with the people. It seemed like such an appropriate song for him. I am just hoping that Obama's start is a sign of what he will do the entire time he is in office, and that that song never reminds me of him. 

A Great Start to the Semester

Ok no offense, but just because you are wearing penny loafers does not mean you actually need to insert a penny into the slot. I saw a GIRL wearing penny loafers with pennies in them today on campus. I get slightly concerned by some of the things I see on that campus, but the scariest thing is when I look in the mirror and realize I am no better than anyone else in my fashion. :)

Anyways today I started school AND found myself a job. Not bad for day 1 of looking right? Well, actually, it is for BYU Vending, I worked for them a couple of years ago, and some-freaking-how, the manager remembered me! I really didn't think he would, particularly without me refreshing his memory since it's been what, 2 1/2 years? Anyways I feel really blessed to have a job. I don't really "need" one perse, since my husband is working this semester (and makes prob 3x what I am) but with only 8 credits on my schedule, I figured a little part-time job would be fun for me. I always enjoyed vending, it's one of those jobs that you never really think about, the vending machine just fills itself, right? Just like billboards change themselves. hehe. But it's really fun to see how things work and I remember how in shape I was from hauling boxes all over campus! I'm definitely looking forward to it.

I am taking 3 classes this semester: My senior english "capstone" course that focuses on mystery and detective literature; The english novel in which we will read a 700 page George Eliot novel, among others; and finally, basic makeup! I am so so excited for this one, b/c I love makeup and now I am going to learn techniques that will hopefully advance me into the field! Oh, and if anyone ever is in town wants to be a model for me, please let me know, as I prefer to work on other people, but I have to bring my own if I want to do that.

So other than nearly peeing my pants in fright coming home in a blizzard tonight, things are going pretty well. Seriously I hate driving in the snow- I never do, since I usually force Trent to drive in those conditions (he is my chauffeur), but since he's out of town, I actually have to do difficult things for myself. Pshhh. 

Happy New Year!

I thought a revamped blog layout would be appropriate for ringing in the new year (even though I'm a few days late in ringing it in, haha). I feel like a schmuck though, because I didn't even come up with any resolutions- not that I would have kept them for very long anyways. Actually, I do hope to come up with a couple, and maybe they don't coincide necessarily with the new year, but they will be things I have planned anyways, such as getting more exercise and eating healthy. Like I say, they probably won't last very long! :)

So just an update on my life: First, I must say I am a little unsure of what direction I'm going to take my blog. I like addressing issues that are important to me, but I also realize that the internet is kind of like the feather analogy - if you rip a pillow open outdoors, and let the feathers float all over, try picking them up again, it will not be possible. Eventually any information on here will be all over the web, and maybe that's not what I want. So we'll see how things go, I still want to address more topics than just the mundane trivialities of life.

Yea so I wrapped up the Fall Semester rather well- I got my best grades ever, which really is not a 4.0 by any means, but I was still pleased with the results. I loved ALL my classes, and it was my last FULL semester of undergrad work. Tomorrow I am starting school; I only have 2 classes (5 credits) this semester, so I plan on getting a part-time job to keep me semi-busy. I don't know where I'll be working yet, but that's something I'm dealing with this week.

Trent and I spent the holiday in the east coast; half of it in Washington DC, the other half of it in NYC. Unfortunately, I caught this "gastroentronitis" or something like that, which is a sort of flu that has been wiping everyone out! It was horrible, I've never felt so ill before. It was weird though because it would kind of come and go, or at least the effects would lessen for a short time before coming back. It was nice that I could go out and do things during those times, but overall I wasn't able to do a lot, because I was so worn out and tired. I did get to go to the MAC Cosmetics Pro store and grab some hard to find goodies! On one of the last nights of my trip, I woke up at 2:30 am with the worst gas pains I'd ever felt in my life. It felt like my stomach was blowing up like a balloon, but no gas was being released. I definitely panicked, wondering what if I just popped? lol it sounds funny, but really wasn't at the time, so my mom took me to the emergency room. I had to wait an hour in the waiting room and wanted to die, the pain was excruciating. However, by the time they admitted me, the gas had started passing a little, and I was starting to feel better. I was given 2 IV bags worth of fluids because I was quite dehydrated- I was gaunt and weak, but as they gave my fluids, my mom said it was amazing that my face started getting fuller and more color again. They also gave me a few pain meds in the IV- wasn't so sure that I needed them, but what the heck, who's going to reject free pain meds? Those made me feel kind of good, at least relaxed enough to sleep for a while when I got home 4 hours later. The next day, they told me I could only eat clear liquids like broth and jell-o but I'm sorry, I couldn't do that all day. I felt better at that point so I might have eaten a little pasta. :) NOW, I've been plagued with a cold, which totally bites - I just can't get rid of these illnesses it seems!

Trent is in Seattle this week for work; he left today, and I already miss him like the dickens! It's times like these that I'm grateful to be living in such close proximity to my mother in law (hehe), because at least there's someone to talk to. It just stinks b/c last year, at least I had my little sister here with me to hang out with, but while I have friends here, I don't really have any that I hang out with, so that might have to change this week. :)

One thing I am a little concerned about is my one and only living grandmother, "Big G". While vacationing in California, she slipped and fell and broke her arm and leg! At first we thought it was her shoulder and pelvic bone, but it turns out it's her thigh bone or somewhere near the pelvis, and her upper arm near her shoulder. She is expected to be in the hospital for a time before she can return home, so quite possibly she won't return for 6-8 weeks. I am also worried that once she does return, she will not be able to perform simple tasks like climbing the stairs. :( I am hoping I can visit her this weekend, since Trent will be out of town anyways. I hope things work out for her.

So that's my life in review in a "nutshell". There's nothing really exciting obviously, but I am looking forward to the next couple months.