Hi

Long time no talk, I know! I have been pretty busy, so when I've had much time to blog is when I've been updating my makeup blog, quackspassionpit.blogspot.com. Check it out, it's fun :)

Anyways, I just have something kind of interesting to share with you. I am watching a documentary called A Case for Christ (thanks to netflix, otherwise I'd never even know about this movie!), trying to prove via historians and such, the existence and being of Christ. In it, one of the scholars shares the following passage:

 "For he shall grow up before him as a tender plant, and as a root out of a dry ground: he hath no form nor comeliness; and when we shall see him, there is no beauty that we should desire him.

 He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.

 Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.

But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.

 All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned every one to his own way; and the Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all.

 He was oppressed, and he was afflicted, yet he opened not his mouth: he is brought as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is dumb, so he openeth not his mouth.

 He was taken from prison and from judgment: and who shall declare his generation? for he was cut off out of the land of the living: for the transgression of my people was he stricken.

 And he made his grave with the wicked, and with the rich in his death; because he had done no violence, neither was any deceit in his mouth."

This scholar, shared this passage with dozens of friends and associates (christians, jews, and so forth) and asked them who this passage was about, and who wrote it. All of the people answered that this scripture is about Christ, and is in the New Testament.

However...it is not from the New Testament.

It is from Isaiah 53. Written thousands of years before Christ came to the earth. 

I think it's very cool to see prophecies of Christ and how he fulfilled those prophecies. I am not super religious but this film is convincing for sure.

'Til next time! 

I'll have a #9 with Ranch and Sweet 'n Sour Sauce

Every year when I come up to Skagway, the thing I miss the most from the real world is Wendy's. I am a sucker for chicken nuggets with ranch and sweet n sour sauce! I don't know why, but I always seem to miss this the most. Because of this, every summer I have had multiple dreams where I discover a town in the middle of nowhere, and it has a Wendy's. I am tormented in the morning when I wake up only to discover that I really didn't consume 400 calories of chickeny nugget goodness. Anyways, this year I decided I was done with the dreams and I was going to put them to rest for good. Since we drove up here, we were able to stop at a Wendy's far north in Alberta- coincidentally the last one we ended up seeing. I was so excited to have my "last supper"! While there, I bought a bag full of sauces to enjoy up here with chicken nuggets.

So anyways, Trent, my sister and some friends went on a road trip to Denali yesterday. I couldn't go because I have to work, but I digress. Today, my sister texts me to say they found a Wendy's- in the middle of nowhere in a town called North Pole (very clever huh)!! WTF!? My dream came true! Sure, it's still a day's drive from me, but so random huh! Not even Juneau, the capital, has a Wendy's (although if it did, I very well might spend the $200 to fly there).

Crazy!

I can rent a car now!

Well...I turned 25 last week. 25! I have always kind of looked forward 25, because it seemed like a turning point age or something. But as the date got closer and closer, I started getting weird and nervous. I think it's because I realized that I will only continue getting older and older...and older. Plus, I think we forget sometimes that we will never be able to go back to a certain age- like we'll never be 16 again- which can definitely be good (who really wants to be 16 again?), but still, we spend all of our youth being excited to get older so we can date or go to college or rent a car, but then when we get there it's like "oh poo, can I be 20 again?"

However, I have heard that the older you get, the better life gets- that the thirties are better than the twenties, and the forties are better than the thirties. I hope it's true. But when I woke up one day after I turned 25, I actually felt different. As if a new leaf had been turned, and I had a fresh start.

Anyways enough of my ramblings!

So, as far as my birthday celebrations-- Trent is always so awesome at putting fun and creative parties together. It is almost always a "surprise party", but as you could imagine, by now I am used to it so it's not really a surprise. I just say "tell me when to be there and I'll act surprised". :P

But this year, he took me on to the ship (Zuiderdam) for dinner. We were joined by my friends Logan, Wil, Casey and Gabby. The dining room is somewhat "fancy"- every single staff that you walk by says "good evening", and it is a multiple course dinner with multiple silverware. You can have as much food as you want- 2 appetizers, 2 entrees, etc- whatever you want! And the names of the items are very "fancy shcmancy". For appetizer I had a goat cheese & tomato tart, followed by a caeser salad. Then I had veal cordon bleu as my entree. And for dessert, I had fresh fruit plate and a cheese platter. But of course there are all sorts of sweets and stuff.

After that, we headed over to our house, where the rest of my friends were congregating. My good friend Suzi decorated the place with pink and purple streamers and balloons. We played a couple games-- "Mafia", and "the name game".

And probably the best part is, Bethany made me a DELICIOUS cake!

Now when I say delicious, I am not just being nice-- this cake was sooo good! It had cream cheese frosting and vanilla cake w/ raspberries! Mmm, yummy! Thank you, Bethany!

Anyways it was just a really fun night and I was so grateful for everyone who came out and celebrated with me- I didn't realize that many people cared about me :)

Yea so 25...

Update

Hi guys! I know it's been forever since I last posted. I've been having a wonderful summer here in Alaska- very very busy, but awesome nonetheless! I'm learning a lot, too. The weather was absolutely gorgeous all throughout May, but in early June, it took a turn for the worst, and it has been kinda frigid since. It has basically been rainy, cloudy and windy. My tan is definitely gone! But somehow we muddle through. :)

Trent and I have been discussing our plans after the summer season. We will hopefully be going on a Caribbean cruise in November, and then after that, we are hopefully going to Japan for a couple of months! How awesome is that? We can only go for 90 days, but that's plenty of time for now.

 Trent and I have been watching a lot of "anime"- which sounds totally nerdy- and it is! I always imagined that anime was all sci-fi and totally lame, but there are so many different shows, that it's like comparing "The Bachelor" to "Glee"- they're all very different! I guess in Japan, anime is more popular than real shows, so they create all sorts of shows in anime form. Anyways, there are a couple that I really like, and it is getting me even more stoked to visit Japan. I am also slowly learning new phrases everyday so I can be ready when I go there! Oh and I have now made sushi 3 times, the last two times have been really delicious, so I almost feel like a professional sushi chef at this point, hehe.

Oh and speaking of nerdiness, Trent has organized "Nerd Night", which meets every Sunday night- basically a bunch of the kids here get together and do really nerdy things, like yes, watch anime, and play "Magic: the Gathering". I can't believe how many of them have gotten into it though, like how many closet nerds there are in this town!

I've also been getting all my friends addicted to True Blood, and enjoying the third season! :)

That's pretty much all for now, but yea, things are good!

Louisiana

I was very fortunate to visit Louisiana and much of the south this year- particularly New Orleans area- and I was very smitten with it. I think Trent agrees that it was one of the highlights of our travels. The area, in and out of the city is pretty, charming, and reflects a unique sense of the south. Also, who can complain about the very forgiving winters? So basically I liked it a lot.

What's become rather interesting to me though, is how "chic" Louisiana is in pop culture right now- Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie moved there a couple years ago, Sandra Bullock just moved there, and Scarlett Johannson just bought a house too! And of course my favorite show, True Blood, takes place in Louisiana.

I am not going to be surprised if we see an influx of celebs and people heading that way soon. But I wonder why it's all of a sudden popular? Because I liked it a lot, but it seems like after Hurricane Katrina, people didn't want to be there anymore...so why now?

Another great place is Gulfport MS. 40 minutes out of New Orleans, and super amazing. True south. 

The BEST 5-Minute Recipe Ever!

Ok so I am not really a chef; in fact, I am quite a novice when it comes to the kitchen. I even have a hard time cooking hamburger patties, haha. But I am kinda sick of the traditional foods (since I ate out for 8 months), and so I'm combing the web for really tasty recipes. One thing I love is bleu cheese. I found a whole page of recipes here, all about using bleu cheese. Tonight, I was trying to think of a quick meal that consisted of few ingredients (since we're in ak folks!), and I remembered this recipe. Now, being the beginner chef, this took me 5 minutes- literally- to put together:

Bleu Cheese and Sundried Tomato Stuffed Chicken Breasts

4 6 to 8 ounce boneless, skinless chicken breasts
4 ounces bleu cheese, crumbled
8 sundried tomatoes, marinated in oil (you can find these already in oil at the store)

Preheat oven to 375F. Pound chicken breasts flat. Sprinkle 1 ounce bleu cheese and 2 sundried tomatoes in the center of each breast. Fold breasts in half and roll, securing with string or toothpicks. Place rolled breasts in a nonstick or lightly oiled baking pan and bake for 20 minutes. Serves 4.

Truly, this was so quick to prepare! I served it with a lovely strawberry & bleu cheese topped mixed green salad, and it was soooo good. I am craving more already and I just finished eating it like 10 minutes ago. Even Trent liked it, which was a good sign since he doesn't generally care for sundried tomatoes. And as easy as it is to make, it "looks" complicated and tastes like something at a really fancy shmancy restaurant, so it's a good idea for a dinner party! hehe.

Anyways I just wanted to share my "win".

What about you, what are some of your favorite 5 min recipes? 

My Love/Hate Relationship with Living in Alaska

Lately I'm like, it's kinda cool living in a small town where you don't have to lock your door or heck, even take the keys out of the ignition. It's weird to not have anonymity sometimes, but for the most part I love that I know everyone and that everyone waves as they pass each other driving, even though half the time I'm like "hmm do I know you?". I love that it's like one big happy family. I love that I don't get all sweaty and gross in the summers- I have practically forgotten what that feels like. Even on "hot" days, there is usually a comfortable breeze.

But, the one thing that I absolutely detest about living up here is...

...how much online retailers charge to ship stuff!!! It's ridiculous, they usually want between $15-50 for shipping! Even if you qualify for free shipping. Like today, I was stoked to find that walmart.com had Kashi bars online, and were free shipping too. Then I go to check out and they want to charge me $24- so basically it was going to be $50 for 8 boxes of granola bars! hahah ridiculous.

Now, you may be thinking it's because it's more expensive to ship to Alaska, but USPS is the same here as it is in the states. Granted, a lot of companies use UPS or Fedex, so that could explain the high shipping, but still.

Some sites that are nice: Maccosmetics.com (thank goodness!), nordstrom.com (awesome!) and forever21.com. THEY don't have surcharges. Victoria's Secret.com only charges like $10 which is still a bit but less than what the rest charge.

It just stinks because things are so friggin hard to get here anyways, and the selection is so limited. I was just so stoked to see my Kashi Go Lean bars on walmart's site, only to be rejected! Grr...

Anyways yea, that's my rant of the day.

Update

Yes, another update! Considering I haven't updated in a while! I am now in Skagway, working hard. I haven't had a day off until today- so 2 weeks straight I worked. It was fun and I learned a lot. But two days off seem to  be a possibility now. Well not the entire day off, but a bit of day off.

I have also decided to share this message: Rid yourself of guilt! This is not directed towards anyone, but I know ALL of us have, one time or another, felt guilty for being ourselves. It can really tear up your life, and so I have decided that I am done with feeling guilty. I refuse to spend the rest of my life feeling like crap because I'm not doing this or that. I don't want to waste any more time feeling that I should be better, that I'm not good enough, etc. It's such a waste! I enjoy life, and figure that God loves me no matter what.

Anyways, have a blessed day, and above all, don't hate on yourself- love yourself for who you are!

A Cute, Inspirational Story

So I have a blogger friend, and she wrote about an experience she had the other day, that I will paraphrase.

It was Sunday, and she was headed to church. On the way, she stopped for a White Chocolate Mocha at Starbucks. As she continued to drive, she was talking to God, basically saying that the day was a day for rejoicing, and she didn't want to get worked up or angry over the little things. She prayed that she could have patience. As she was getting out of the car at church, her mocha fell and spilled out all over. She was about to get angry because her $4 drink was now on the ground. However, she took a deep breath and didn't let her feelings get the best of her. Well, then she walked into church, and she went into the choir room, and one of the women had brought coffee and juice for everyone. One of the coffee flavors was White Chocolate Mocha.

She says: "I felt like all was part of a mini test from God and I'm glad. When we keep our promises to God, even if things turn wrong he never forgets about us. He knows about our needs and he fulfills them."


I really liked this story, and it made me think about how sometimes we are tested, and we may not know why things happened, but God does. Anyways, just a cute story! 

Eating Out Rant

Hi, so I have been a bit MIA lately. Again I just haven't had much to say, haha. Work has been pretty low-key, we have only had like 2 shows a week, but Thursday, can you believe, is our LAST show! Wow, I can't believe we're almost done with this job.

Well, right now we're in Montana. We spent the weekend in Great Falls, and I decided that they win the award for WORST servers ever! We couldn't believe the atrocious service we got at restaurants. As you may know, we have to eat out for every meal, and so you can imagine that after seeing restaurants from state to state, we know what service we like. Well, we went to like, 10 restaurants in Great Falls, and the best service, if you can believe it, was at McDonald's, and only because we A) didn't have to wait 20 min just to pay, or B) we didn't have to beg our server for a refill! Ok, "beg" is a bit exaggerated, but we have not been in a place where the servers didn't automatically refill the drink when it was getting low. In fact, I can't remember a single time. Until Great Falls. After the first, I thought, "ok, maybe it's a fluke". Then the next was the same. And the next. And the next. Until we were sucking on ice cubes. Hahaha. Anyways, another doozy was at Coldstone (of all places!), and they served us our ice cream but didn't ring us up, they just went back to scooping ice cream for other people. I am not kidding when I say we waited 10 minutes for them to ring us up. Yea, I ate my ice cream at the register. hehe.

Now, I don't want to sound like a snob when I go into restaurants; in fact, I think Trent and I tend to be a little bit too passive with our servers (so hopefully our food isn't spit in? i dunno, haha), but I also believe that the reason restaurants were even invented was so you could pay someone to make you food and serve it to you. NOT so you could watch your server go by the table 30 times before bothering to bring your check or take your order. Which happened yesterday. The girl brought our check but didn't come back for our credit cards for 20 minutes. We played on our phones in front of a table of dirty plates. In fact, Trent and I have this silly joke, where after so long of waiting, we start saying "Yes I'll have a diet coke" to thin air. It's silly and geeky.

Anyways, here are the small things I think make a great server:
-Refill drinks when drink looks halfway- and refill BOTH at one time, because by the time you bring the one, the other person's will be ready to refill. Plus it's just nice
-Don't bring the check before offering if they would like dessert. It makes it seem rushed, and you never know when someone's gonna want dessert. Cracker Barrel does this all the time, and coincidentally it's one of my favorite places for dessert (Coca-cola cake, mm!!).
-Check with guests after dropping off meals, to see how it is. I dislike when servers never come back til it's time to deliver the check.
-Be prompt, don't make guests wait too long to get drink orders, food orders, checks, etc. Because what if you get a poop attack at the end of dinner, but you have to wait for the person to get the check? Inconvenient, that's what happens. :D haha.

I think that's it. Not hard, though, right? Am I high maintenance? :P

A Grief Observed

This post is about a week late, but I definitely have thought about it frequently. It's been over a month now since my grandma's funeral. It's still so surreal to me that she is gone. In fact, I have sort of "replaced" her in my prayer- for 24 years she  has been in my prayer in the same place!- and so now I have to remember that she is gone and I put other people in her stead. But oddly enough, she is still in my prayers, as I'm hoping she is watching over me and knows that I am thinking of her. And that right there is so surreal. I still can't believe she is gone. It just does not seem like there was time for her to get ill and die. I wonder how it is for her, what she's doing and if my prayers get delivered to her. I always hoped that when she died, I would "know"; that I'd get some sort of premonition or feeling. Well that didn't really happen. About the moment she died, I was walking through a mall- I checked my phone to see the time, and she crossed my mind. But it wasn't really a thought of death; rather, I thought "maybe she will end up living for longer than we think. Maybe she will be around for a few more weeks". Wishful (and selfish) thinking I guess. Instead she died at that moment, because when I got back to my hotel, my mom called me and told me the time of death, and it was just about when I was thinking of her. But I didn't get a burning kiss on my cheek, I didn't see her in the mall, nothing like those stories you sometimes hear.

Anyways, C.S. Lewis penned a memoir called "A Grief Observed", in which he deals with the grief he has for his recently-deceased wife. It's an interesting piece, and probably the most interesting thing about it is that his experience is really nothing like mine. And that is what this piece is usually heralded for: that everyone's experience in grief is different.

Granted, I lost it at the funeral. I couldn't hold back anything, I just felt so hopeless as I blubbered away. But other than that, I've stayed pretty controlled. Except when I think about talking to her. I hope she knows I'm thinking of her. It's just so weird to experience grief, because I've never really had to deal with such a close death. My other grandparents died when I was significantly younger, and while they were amazing, the relationship was just not quite as developed. Anyways, I hope time will heal the wound.

Ramble

It seems so weird that life should be one of our biggest pre-occupations. I think we sometimes focus so much on making sure that life is lived correctly, instead of just living life. There's no going back. Sometimes that scares me, to think that I won't ever get to re-do high school or college or now. That has passed, no matter what I believe. But at the same time, I wonder if we focus too much on how to live life, thus we don't really enjoy it.

Like, when you graduate college, you are put in a couple of different categories: There are the over-achievers who either get into Harvard, or do enough internships to get some hot shot job in NYC, and their lives are set. Or, there is the other group, who don't really do a lot of internship, but they graduate and live a simple but successful life. I always kind of wondered, am I not successful, because I didn't automatically get the hot shot job out of college?

Or, why is it, that women are NEVER satisfied with their body? No matter what age, they're always scrutinizing. I mean, you can be 50 years old, and be a little heavier than your 20 year old self. Yet women will complain? Why can't we be satisfied? I mean, at 50, the body is never going to look like 20 ever again. I'm 24, and I am realizing I will never have the same body/energy/etc as an 18 year old. So why are never at peace?

I just wonder, are we ever satisfied at just living life? Or are we trying to live up to a standard for so long, that we don't really enjoy life? We just sit there scrutinizing ourselves, debating at what could be better?

Annoying Sales Person

So I mentioned the other day how I am getting a little burned out and how I'm ready to be finished with our job out on the road. Tonight we had an event, and I realized that, although I'm burned out of being on the road, I think the content of our presentation really helps me from being burned out on our sales pitch. Like, I'm really not a sales person. I hate "selling" things, and have often thought that I'd probably be horrible if I had to do Multi-Level Marketing or something like that. But, I also feel that if you believe in what you're selling, it makes a huge difference. I think I could safely sell Volvos, because I am enthusiastic about them and think they're awesome cars. I could sell MAC Cosmetics, because I gush over everything they make. As for Holland America Line's Alaska Cruise Tour product, I truly feel it is the absolute best way to see Alaska. I think if you do any research, you'd be a fool to choose any other way to see Alaska besides Holland America. If I didn't truly believe this, I think my job would be really hard. It would be hard to convince someone to take a tour if I felt guilty for tricking them into buying a not-so-great experience. So it's a good thing that Holland America has given me an excellent product to sell. It makes me enthusiastic every time we tell people about it, and I have learned so much about being able to sell something.

On the same topic, Alaska for me is just 1 1/2 months away- I can't believe it! It's weird too because though I am looking forward to it, I am also a little apprehensive. I feel this way every single year. I think it's because every year, I have a new/different job, so it's not just tea and crumpets. But yea, I look forward to being in beautiful Skagway. It's such an amazing place!

Blah Blah Blah

Ok I'm back with yet more random ramblings...This is actually a thought I had a few weeks ago, when that guy rammed that plane into the building in Austin, TX. It's at times like that where most mildly crazy people aren't so bad. Like, you know when someone goes through a break-up or has a break down at work or something- whatever it is- and they do some admittedly "crazy"? Like a guy who is so infatuated with a girl that he acts a little stalkerish, or a co-worker reams out everyone who walks into his/her office for no obvious reason...We usually think that person is a little crazy, right? But I think these people should get a free pass. Because as long as they're not crashing planes into buildings or bringing bombs on planes or shooting up campuses, I think it's okay to be a little crazy in moderation- after all, everyone has acted a fool at least a few times in their life. Most of us look back in shame at those moments and think of how horrible a person they are that they acted that way, and how no one else acts that way, but let's face it- everyone has.

I really don't know what I am trying to say, other than everyone should be allowed to act a little crazy sometimes, and get a free pass. haha wow.

Eeyore Moment

Why are some days just so much better than others? Today is one of those not so good days. I dunno, I just feel depressed. I slept in til 1:00pm. Second day in a row. That is so sucky. We got out of the hotel room long enough to grab some food, hit up Target and Nordstrom Rack. I was going to do laundry to keep myself and my mind occupied for a bit but they don't have a laundry facility at this hotel. So now I'm back to sitting around, on my duff in the same spot. I'm sooo bored! And I know these things I'm complaining about is all so petty, but it really does add to my feeling of hopelessness. I kind of wish this job was over. I'm getting a little burnt out. Not really burnt out of the job, but of sitting around so much. We have a lot of off time, whether it's a travel day or day off, just time to sit and wait and wait and wait. I'm just really eager to get through this last month, so that I can feel a little more fulfilled in life...I dunno...It's just hard to be away from friends and family for so long, and to be constantly moving around. I like visiting new places and seeing new things, but I think I'm done. It's hard to enjoy these new places when your mind is somewhere else. Sorry to be such a debbie downer today, but this is my blog right, so I guess I can complain every once in a while. :(

Totally Random (But not altogether worthless) Rant

Sorry I haven't posted in a few days, I've been thinking that there's not much to say lately! haha. No but this is a totally random thought that's been on my mind today. It has nothing to do with anyone, so don't worry, I'm not being passive aggressive. But I was wondering, why is it that so many men and women out there are willing to be active participants in home wrecking? Like, why are women so interested in married men? Why would you even consider feelings for a married man? And, why do men do the same?

In NYC, there were a few married men (all quite gross looking as it stands) that tried to get me to go out on a date with them. One guy that I worked with even called me AT WORK, yes on the work phone, and he was like, whispering, saying something about how he couldn't talk long because his wife was in the other room but when could we hang out. I was just like "Umm, first off, I'm at work. Second, wtf, you're gross. Third, you are married and your wife is in the other room! Could you get any creepier?" Ok I might not have been that confrontational, but I definitely was so weirded out. I thought it was messed up. There was another married guy that showed interest me and yes, I thought him good looking, but I could not even imagine going down that path. I just think my conscience would feel like crap! And to also think that you'd have to deal w/ all the drama of keeping things secret-annoying! But mostly I just couldn't go behind another female's back. I don't owe her anything, sure, but that is just, in my opinion, one of the meanest things you could do to someone. And I like how people always say, "oh but our feelings are just so strong" or they act like the fates brought them together in an inconvenient but intended way. To that I say, b.s.! You have control over your feelings. And as soon as you see the ring, turn those sorts of feelings off. Just say to yourself, "I will acknowledge that this person is good looking/nice/funny/charming/a catch, etc. I am allowed to admire and admit those traits. But just because I find good traits in someone doesn't mean I have to mount him/her". It is a weak and selfish person that says they "can't". I think a lot of marriages would be around still if people just didn't walk away with every person they're attracted to.

I know, this is totally a random tangent. Where did this come from? I have no idea. But a friend recently commented that it is way too easy to have an affair, like easier than easy. And that made me sad, to think so many people can live with that. I mean, there are certain "sins" if you will, that if I do, I don't feel an ounce of guilt. That's the truth. But cheating on or with someone would truly make me feel dark and unhappier than pretty much anything else. I don't think I could live with myself. But then again, maybe some people feel truly guilty about things that I don't, so maybe it's an equal exchange.

Anyways, random rant over!

To an Athlete Dying Young

So, I'm watching a show about John Lennon's assassination. They showed a few clips of some fans that are totally incapacitated due to grief for the loss of their favorite musician. At first glance, I think this is kind of weird that people get so emotional over a celebrity's death- someone they've never met before. But, I think that even when someone isn't physically in our life, they can still play an important enough role to elicit grief. One of these examples is Heath Ledger. I was never a die-hard Heath Ledger fan. I think he was a good actor, but that's about it, I never followed his career or anything. And yet, even today, when I see a clip of something on t.v. about him, I kind of feel a pang of sadness about him being gone. It's kind of surreal because seeing his image on t.v., it doesn't seem like he should be dead; he's still fairly relevant in pop culture. But he's dead. And it's kind of a shame, and I think that every time I see him on t.v.

But then sometimes I think death immortalizes people so much, and if they had lived out their life, would they be the angels we make them out to be? The answer is clearly no. I mean, MLK was an amazing man and did a lot of great things for the human race. But if he'd lived long enough, would he be considered too radical? Would he have said something totally outrageous? Would he be the stuff legends are made of?

Or if JFK or heck, even JFK Jr. had lived long enough, would they have had secret lives and all sorts of scandal to scar their image? Would JFK Jr. cheated on his wife? Would he be the John Edwards of today? I know, these things seem like sacrilege to some, and obviously it's all unsupported speculation. There's no evidence that JFK Jr. would've been a bad person. But if they hadn't died young, would we still feel the same way?

There's a poem by A.E. Housman called, To an Athlete Dying Young. It basically talks about the town's star athlete who dies in the height of his success. The author states "smart lad, to slip betimes away, from fields where glory does not stay". In essence, he died during his success, so he was forever immortalized in the last memory of him- as a star athlete. But if he'd lived to become fat, bald, ugly, poor, old, etc, his image would've vastly changed. So the author says, it's better to die in your prime than to be remembered as the bed wetting invalid geriatric.

What do you think? Is it better to die young in your prime, or live a long life and maybe be a little humble?

In my opinion, I'd rather live a long life than one focused on how people will remember me. Yea, I want people to remember me as a good person, but I also don't live my life to impress or please other people. I've never really been super exceptional at anything anyways, so it's not like I'm failing anyone, hahah.

Early Memories

What is your very earliest memory in your life? I'd have to say, mine is when we went to California when I was 4 years old. We stayed with my aunt and uncle, and we went to Disney Land. I remember Disney Land- the teacups, the dumbo ride, the small world ride, and one that took you up into a mountain and there was this white abominable snowman at the top, and then you go coasting down the mountain. Oh and I think the Back to the Future ride is in there somewhere, along with being in a gift shop. I also remember this funny thing, where, when we were at my aunt's house, my cousin Cameron (who was probably 5 at the time) and my older brother were eating marshmallows early in the morning, and Cameron yelled down from the second story, "Hey mom, we ate the marshmallows, so don't buy anymore, ok?" and she was like "ok", but that night we had hot cocoa, and she had bought more marshmallows, and Cameron was all upset about that whole thing, hahaha. It's such a weird memory, I don't know why I remember it. In fact, the whole thing is so fuzzy that when I look back, I sometimes find it hard to believe that it ever happened.

So, I've always kind of assumed that the above was my earliest memory, but I have also had this memory of a movie, where this girl and her dad were out of their bodies and were ghosts, and the dad was freaking out b/c he wanted his daughter to go back to her body but she wouldn't. I remember it kind of spooked me out. Well over the years I have occasionally (though admittedly rarely) looked back and recalled this movie, but I never knew what it was- until, the other day, I was flipping through the channels and saw it on tv! I recognized it immediately. It's called Ghost Dad, and after watching a couple minutes of it, I realized that it was so stupid. haha. But I'm not the only one, the IMDB rating for it is also horrendous- I think it got a 3.8 out of 10! haha sucky. 

I just really like coming full circle and making some sense out of my earliest memories. In fact the other day, we went to Disney World, and they have a lot of the same classic rides as Disney Land, and we got to go on a few of them. While on those rides, it was almost like my memory was jogged and/or new details were recalled or at least added. I liked coming full circle and going back in my mind. :)

Ok I'm done rambling but one last early memory: When my great-Grandma Martindale died. I remember being back at my grandma's house after the funeral, and thinking how lucky Grandma Martindale was for dying of old age (she was 90 at the time), and how she was lucky that she didn't get shot, as I thought that's how most people died...sad to think a 5 year old thinks it's lucky if you don't get shot dead in life!! 

Now, tell me about your early memories, what are they?

Animals (cont).

So remember earlier how I wrote about my doubts in using animals for profit? Well, the more that I think about it, I do believe that Sea World and Barnum & Bailey, etc are kinda crock. I know others will feel differently but yea, I've decided I don't want to support such endeavours.

BUT, when it comes to pets, I believe that a traditional, domesticated animal is pretty awesome. Most people know that I have quite a love for animals, one in particular: cats! I have had many a cat in my lifetime, and if I ever am an old widow, I hope to have at least 50 cats :) haha jk. But I have talked before about buying a huge plot of land and making it a cat haven, hahaha. I really will be the crazy dirty old cat lady though! :P

But something I've always wondered is why many people treat their pets like humans, and if Fido dies, they act as if it was their child that died. For example, I used to cat sit for a single, middle-aged woman when she'd go out of town. Her cat's name was Big Boy, and she really really cared about this cat. To her, he was her child. She totally clicked with him on a crazy level, and when she talked about him, it was like he was a human being. I have always wondered what she would do if he died. We have a few cats at my parents, two of which who are turning 17 this year. I have no idea how I will respond to their deaths, but I did realize why people feel so close to their animals.

I realized how unconditional pets are. They love you no matter what. Well, as long as you feed them and don't abuse them, of course. But they don't ever just change their mind and decide they don't like you, or think maybe it's time for you to move on. They don't say that you guys don't "click" or get along; to animals, as long as you show them a little respect, they return it unconditionally. They also are quick to forgive, hardly remembering the wrongs you have shown.

So if anyone thinks that animals are brainless or dumb, remember that although they aren't as "intelligent" as us, they can do some things that most humans have a really tough time doing.

A matter of when, not if

Sometimes I find myself being very shy on my own blog. I feel like all I can really blog about are puppydogs and rainbows, otherwise I am going to disappoint a lot of people with my opinions. But I mean, this is my blog, right? So can I be truthful with you?

Because I heard today about the Sea World employee who was killed today in Orlando by a killer whale. First off, I am truly sorry to hear that something like this has happened, and my sympathy goes out to the victim's family.

However, as we all know, killer whales do not typically live up to their name. It's always been one of those silly things- despite being called "killer", they are generally quite gentle. But it certainly raises a question of, what the heck are we doing, corralling animals in to small spaces, "training" them to make money for us? We've been paying to be entertained by animals for centuries (Circuses, Zoos, Seigfried and Roy), so we don't think anything of it. In fact, most of us are innocent people who just want to see cute, cuddly-looking animals that we'd never get to see otherwise. But does that make it all okay? What makes a normally docile animal attack? Maybe we are showing our love for animals in the wrong way. If we truly love them should we make them stay in small enclosures, demand them to perform and entertain? What do you think? I'm afraid I don't know the "right" answer. But what I do know is that a lot of these incidents are not a matter of if, but when.

Of course this would then bring up the question of animals as pets, because if animals aren't for our entertainment, then should we even have pets? Well, I know that is an equally tough question, and my opinion may differ from that of others. My view is that as long as the animal is not confined to small spaces relative to their size, then it's okay. But if it's a rabbit that spends 22 hours of its day in a cage, then yea, I kinda take issue with that.

But yea, what do you think about the way we use animals?